In order to go home, all NICU graduates are required to sit in their carseat for an hour and a half without their oxygen dropping. I watched that monitor for the entire hour and a half.

When you are at the end of your pregnancy you are focused on one thing only, bringing your baby home.  You organize, you clean, and you daydream of being discharged and what it will feel like to bring that bundle of joy home.  I imagined that scenario more times than I can count.  What I didn’t imagine was being discharged without him.  We went up for our last feeding before we would fill out the discharge paperwork and I couldn’t help but to cry.  The nurses kept offering what they call “mom’s place”.  It’s a room on the NICU floor that allows you to stay close to your little one.  The problem is that it is typically only if your baby is only going to be another day or two.  When I was discharged they had no idea when he’d go home, so what is the point of delaying the inevitable? Continue reading


The NICU wakeup call

Our little man after they took his iv out of his hand and put it in his belly button.

Every day for those few weeks our son was in the NICU started the same for my husband and I.  We would get up at 6am, grab what I called the nipple bag*, grabbed Dunkin’, and drove the half hour to the hospital.  Then park, wave at the guard on our way in, and take the elevator to the ninth floor.  We would wash our hands and then press the call button so they could let us in.

And then we’d take the walk.  Continue reading